In 2009, I’ve decided to quit holding myself back. This habit is extremely long-seeded and is an every-single-moment-type meditational process. I’m so used to second-guessing and thwarting every single action that I take that I’m having to slowly coax myself through each day, internally encouraging every decision I make and constantly repeating the mantra “Push things forward.” From getting on the treadmill to spritzing a new perfume that seems too flirtatious for how I view myself, I’m pushing myself to step outside my comfort zone. On day 4, it’s already starting to seem easier.

Aaaaanyhoo, it seems I’m enthusiastically plunging forward with creating my Yum in the Tub Scrub business and I’m getting excited about making this my side project for this year. I don’t hope my line becomes the next Blue Q or anything, but I’d like to make a couple thousand every year selling my product online and in boutiques in the area. (And if Oprah wants to feature me on her Favorite Things episode, then so be it.)

I’ve loved preparing this project alongside Greg, who’s an expert in marketing, designing packaging and other aspects of commercial graphic design I couldn’t begin to understand. Every night for the last couple weeks, we’ve worked on banging out web advertisements (like those seen at MBRN.com), print advertisements (like those I’m hoping to get into Bust Magazine by the end of 2009), labels for regular jars, labels for sample jars, packaging for shipments, business cards, promo stickers, new webstore layouts, etc.

The thing is, when we’re collaborating, it hardly seems like work and we find ourselves sitting up for hours working on photo editing and designing other things for around the house and in our personal lives. In fact, at the moment, we have a few side-projects going that we eagerly get to every other evening or so. Who knew I’d actually think it was nice being able to work with one’s spouse creatively? Hunh…

However, as my list of Things To Do for the Business piles up, I’m starting to get overwhelmed. What do I know about pitching a product and creating retail price packages? I don’t know anything about taxes! I don’t know how much I should charge for a sugar scrub in a market where people are literally selling homemade bubble bath in schwanky boutiques for $36!! (In South Carolina! Can you believe it!?) Suddenly, my small side project has taken on new life. I’ll need printed labels and shipping materials and should I apply for a business loan or a business credit card and where should I get my wholesale products from and should I go ahead and stock up on supply or wait until I have an actual buyer and should I be taking small-business classes over at the local tech school or just kind of wing it and should I jack up my online prices if retailers choose to sell my product for double my online price!??!? I’m up until 2 a.m. these days making lists of materials and expenses and things to get done and then, of course, the lists of the lists so I’m staying on top of everything.

The hope is that once all my overhead planning is out of the way, that my business will be able to run like a well-oiled machine where I can provide retailers with product monthly and introduce new products gradually, perhaps once every six months when I’ve had some time for R&D. But right now? It’s turning into a lot of work having to do with numbers and contacts and graphs and learning about business and paperwork.

And somehow, despite all this discomfort and uncertainty, I’m getting more excited about my tiny business every day. This is a good feeling.